When I tell my friends that my research involves anti-cancer drugs, they ask me if I’ve found the cure for cancer yet. Although I usually answer with a smile and tell them I am still working on it, I believe I’ve learned so much from my research that does not directly involve science. My research experience in the MCDB Department at UCSB helped me grow into the student I am today and motivates me in my journey to become a successful research scientist.

Many of my peers warned me about the steep learning curve I would face when starting in a new lab. Since this was my first research experience, I (reluctantly) accepted the challenges I would face as a newcomer in the lab. I expected a gentle introduction to lab work, but to my surprise, I was immersed and involved in the projects immediately.  Within a short timeframe, I acquired the skills needed to raise my own flask of cancer cells and run various assays to test for drug activity.  During this time, I struggled with self-doubt – I had a nagging feeling that I was incapable of completing experiments on my own. However, I quickly realized that I had to ask questions and take notes on everything going on until routine procedures became second nature to me.  Over a year later, I am much more confident in my skills and I’ve even helped newcomers get started in the lab.  This newfound confidence found its way into my academic life as I started taking more difficult upper-division biology courses. Persistence has helped me in the lab and in the classroom.

The lab environment I work in is especially exciting because I work directly with my faculty mentor, Dr. Thrower, along with the five other undergrads in my lab.  Our lab may be small, but we are constantly busy with new experiments and interpretation of results.  Since we do not have graduate students to delegate work among us, we are in constant communication with our faculty mentor and we are directly involved in every aspect of our experiments.  It can be stressful when it feels like no one understands what’s going on in the lab, but we rely on each other for support and guidance every day.

Research has taught me more than just the skills I need in lab.  I’ve learned how to be resourceful, resilient, and to embrace the inevitable uncertainty of starting a new project.  In addition, working in a small lab environment has given me more opportunities and responsibilities than I expected.  As a Gorman scholar, I’ve gotten the chance to share my research with other motivated undergrads in STEM and hear about the fascinating research that goes on around me.  Working full-time in a research lab was something I could not imagine last year, but I am thrilled about this experience.  With less than 3 weeks left in the Gorman program, I’m looking forward to spending my last month of summer relaxing (and out of the lab!) while reflecting on my summer research experience.

“If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?” – Albert Einstein

Research is exciting because you can learn something new that no one else has ever known of before. And with this new knowledge, you can spread it to a community of others who are eager to learn new information. But since sometimes you don’t exactly know what you’re looking for, research can be just as frustrating as well. During my internship over the summer, I realized how frustrating research can be sometimes when experiments do not go as planned and days of work in the lab are wasted. But during the same time, I also learned how to deal with these frustrations in various ways.

I’m currently investigating protein-surface interactions in Plaxco’s research group. The bulk of my time in the lab is dedicated to engineering and producing our own proteins needed for our experiments. Since we’re acquiring our own proteins, we must capture and purify these proteins that are purposely overexpressed in bacteria cultures we grow. This process requires many steps and spans over multiple days. And within this process, many variables – both human and experimental – can affect the outcome of this procedure. Of course, not everything in research can go as planned. Failing to acquire our proteins have led to frustration, self-doubt, and a sense of wasted time.

Luckily, I have spare time outside of lab that I can dedicate for dealing with these frustrations. Whenever I leave lab feeling as though lab work did not go as well as I hoped, I sit outside reflecting on my frustrations. There isn’t really much you can do if research plans fall through. Usually, you diagnose what went wrong and hopefully fix a mistake in your experimental procedures. Otherwise, you have to start from square one. Yes, it feels like I’m beating myself up at some points. But this moment of self-reflection allows me to approach mistakes in a logical way.

For the rest of the day, I’d like to take my mind off of research and blow off some steam by exercising. I recently picked up cycling as a hobby. I’d ride with my friends to downtown Santa Barbara and back and we’d usually hang out a bit afterward in Isla Vista. This exercise helps me release stress and also helps me socialize at the same time. If I do not go on a bike ride, I’d go to the gym to lift some weights. Physical activities help take my mind off of research for a brief moment while also benefiting my overall health. In a way, I’m turning something negative from research into a net positive for my well-being.

I felt lost and frustrated a lot of times while working in lab especially at the start of my research internship. I’ve come to accept these emotions because I realized recently that these feelings are normal in a research environment. For instance, an experimental procedure my mentor has been developing for the past three years has only started showing promising results this summer. I could only imagine how many times he has faced feelings of doubt and failure to reach success. This process, however, makes research so much for valuable and fulfilling than one would expect. The hard work and studiousness needed for a job where results are hard to see at first make success a lot more worth it in the end.